Our upbringing is so

Always down you have to bow

Wonder what is right and wrong

They’ll tell you when to hum a song

In the depths of disparate 

Our souls grow desperate 

Filled with guilt

Brittle heart you built

Asking whether or not you are worthy

Marking all your steps loathly

Never shown the other side

Things can be brighter on the ride

Sacrifice, compromise and channelize

Life gone by once you realize

“Deserve the best” was too filled with agony

You painted my world your shade of mahogany

Servitude to seek God

God to seek happiness

But my happiness lies in that fillet of sole

But that’s not spiritually approved by your soul
Taught to wonder if not this then what

How to be better that the rut

Suppressing all your wants 

Dismissing all your needs

In the name of strength to gain

After all, no pain no gain

Why are we taught so, I wonder

“Why won’t she just surrender?”

When did thinking for self become selfish?

When did selfish become the blemish?

If it doesn’t serve me, then who should  it serve?

Don’t you see how sacrifice becomes needs unmet, needs unmet makes a dissatisfied me, a dissatisfied me makes an unhappy me, an unhappy me makes me wonder.. it makes me wonder of what ifs and what nots.. it makes me scrounge in pain for a little love, for a little praise. I expect others to do good I did upon thee. But what good it is? I sacrificed in the thought of good and made a fool of me.. now tied in the shackles agitated to die. Expectations are the root cause of letdown. Sigh.
We seek a meaning larger than life

But only realize the truth so rife

That’s gone by and filled with regret

You set out to teach the same threat

Growing in the layers of fear

Caught in the shackles of the past so mere

Forever trying to forecast the future so dear

Present slipped away in rubble

I feel it is time to pop the bubble, 

Trust me, it isn’t too much trouble!

The world is coming upon DIY – Do it Yourself

I say SIY- Serve it Yourself

LFY- Live for Yourself

LBYD- Live Before You Die

I before you

Never to feel blue

No mommy no daddy

No personal caddie

Don’t call it being lonely

It is unaltered as nature made me to be; self-sufficient and wildly free.

To have a spine and stand straight

To look up to the sky and feel great

To know the reason behind your smile is you

To see the empire you built and never rue

You know you’re worthy for every ounce of happiness this world has to offer and more

You know you deserve what you desire and it is never too much to score

Living the fat off the land, churning the milk of the ocean and loudly I roar

To listen to your beating heart, to grow and to give good things to the world is what I call life

Not what you taught me in leaps of pseudo spirituality seeking what I can’t see, touch or feel-the ongoing strife

All that and more pinned on your board of shortcomings, they are such a bore 

Now I won’t carry on the burden of your failures anymore

I am tired and I give up

To start a new life where I practice self-service

And do every little thing for my own purpose

I have nothing do with you, nor to hurt nor to help

New person in me has whelped

There goes your upbringing 

Turning into dust with the song I’m singing.